Friday, April 29, 2011

The Dangerous Book for Moms: Chapter 3

Right about now, you might be anticipating starting the month of May.

Not me.

I'm heading into:
The Month of Me.

What is the Month of Me?

Well, to be clear, it is not a month of self-indulgence or selfishness.
And it's not a mid-life crisis type of month where I stop making dinner and neglect my kids!

It IS a month to rediscover, rejuvenate, and reacquaint myself...with....MYSELF.

Some of you are very good at taking care of yourselves, but I admit that I am not.  Oh, I'm not neglected by any means.  My "problem" is that I live a lot like I drive.  When I want to get somewhere on a project, I put the pedal to the metal, and it's full-speed ahead.  If I am excited about something that I want to teach  my kids, then I put 110% of my energy and time into that project.  I actually LOVE doing this...(duh, as if that wasn't obvious!)...but I think it's time to stop for gas, to slow-down and take in the scenery, and to think about which destinations I personally want to add to my trip-tick in life.

In order to do this, I am going to be re-exploring things that I used to do in my "previous life":

For instance, in my previous life, I used to liked to dress up, 
stalk hang out with celebrities, and wear the color red.  

I also liked to play sports, read books, and sleep.

I liked to ask a lot of questions of people I barely knew.
And I loved to write poetry.

I still love to write...but what about the other stuff?

Do I still like to do the things I once loved?  CAN I still do them?
Is there room for them in my life now?

This month is an opportunity for me to make time for the things that once made me Me, so that I can put more of Me into my mothering in the future.

The Month of Me is an all-month theme that I'm going to use to guide my decisions about how I spend my time.  Here are the only rules to remember, if you'd like to join me:

1.  Do things that I WANT to do.
2.  Do things that contribute in some way to my WELL-BEING. (physical, mental, emotional...) or the well-being of my personal relationships.
3.  Engage in activities that I don't normally have time for or try something new.

I'm not going to be doing any special blog posts about this, but you are all invited to participate in your own ways.

A woman who knows herself well is a very DANGEROUS thing indeed.

I'm off to Yoga for Congo tonight...something I really WANT to do, something that is good for me, and something that I never do...check, check, check!


  1. i am thinking that this might give me license to turn down a calling. Thanx.

  2. It's been so long - I don't even know that I would know where to start! Great post - thank you!

  3. As an empty nester, this process you are going through this month has time to happen in and of itself. I am way more in touch with my pre-child self than I was during the hands-on mothering years. That's why I'm writing so much again.

    I see a lot of the drive, energy, and creative ability that characterize you at work here on your blog, Jocelyn. So I suspect you are exercising more of the "old you" than you perhaps appreciate (just in different ways).

    Having said that, I like your idea. All mothers need to stay in touch with who they are, at their centers.


  4. Yay!!!for the greatness of a woman...she is the power root of the family unit, rarely seen as a wonderwoman...this was a great post.

  5. I'm jealous, especially of the conga yoga and the stalking of celebrities. Best wishes for a wonderful May!

  6. Oh, Jocelyn, thank you so much for writing this. I tried to tell a friend that I was struggling because I don't really know what I like to do anymore, and she got so upset at me. I tried to explain that I really do love the opportunity to be a SAHM, but that I want to develop a talent -- something that's just me.

    Thank you so much for saying that's okay. Good luck in your hunt!

  7. I am doing something similar in May! I tell my family it is my month because of Mother's Day and my birthday. I am going to do a Picture A Day in May (because I love to take picture of random things that no one cares about but me...), I am going to do silly posts I have been wanting to do for a long time (that I am sure will only entertain me_, and I am going to work on a list of projects that I have been wanting to do but have been totally neglecting because in general getting in the way! Great minds think a like. :)I have to say that yours will be much more interesting than mine though because you are one of the most creative people I have ever come across!!!! I can't wait to see what you come up with in your journey! Good luck!

  8. I have been really trying to do more of this lately. I read more, play the violin more, and write more. Things I would like to do more of - sew more, go more places (travel more - WITH the family), and garden more (although as the weather warms up, I'm doing more of this, too - we have baby grass growing in the backyard where we put down seed a few weeks ago! And tulips EVERYWHERE - apparently two owners before us had a thing for tulips...)

  9. Good luck with your quest... I hope you have a fabulous month! :D

  10. I love this idea! I actually just gave a talk in a RS meeting along this same topic... but I'm still so far from being good at it! :)

  11. This is an awesome idea; and I think I will ponder on it. I do think we all get so busy that we leave our some of the more special moments we could have just with ourself.
    There are still so many things I want to learn and do and at this age I had better hurray.
    Thanks for the thoughts and blessings to you!

  12. This is an awesome post Jocelyn and I really hope your month of Me is a Smashing Success!!!!

  13. I LOVE this! It reminds me of the Learning Circle Topic for April with the Power of Moms. You should check it out. You would really like it! And I just LOVE this idea! So great! So necessary! Like giving yourself oxygen first if your in a plane crash rather than giving your children all the oxygen while you die and then can't help them anyways.

  14. I did this without realizing I was participating in Month of Me. I started school this week. I've always wanted to go to college. But grades and time and money prevented me before. Now, in my 30's, I'm going to a university. I'm really doing it. It's crazy and exhausting but oh so fulfilling right now.